This week is my biggest week of Uni assignments, and papers, and exams, and so forth, and what did i do today? Today I went for a long walk by the beach. 6 hours in fact.
It was true freedom in the richest sense of the word.
I didn't even feel that daunting burden of "Oh my gosh I have so much to do!"
I walked from Burleigh Beach to Labrador (my home), which is like a 12 mile walk along the coast. It was gorgeous. I walked with my friend Molly, and we left at 7:00 a.m. took a bus for an hour to Burleigh, and started trucking back home. We made random stops, ate apples and carrots, played in the ocean, saw probably over 100 dead jellyfish washed up on the beach, and found the coolest shells.
We also got lost in a random trailer park (along the water weird I know), played in a playground with little kids, and swam in the bay and jumped off the docks. It was glorious.
Now my feet hurt....I am still not done with my assignment that is due tomorrow morning, and I am sun burnt...but I realized that God does what he promises.
As I was walking I realized that I came to Australia to learn about freedom. Freedom from schedules, and pleasing people, and just being enough and trying really really hard. And freedom from believing that what I do effect the way God feels about me (as if i have to make up old time to make my past just go away).
And in Australia I have struggled. Deeply struggled and hated myself, my sin, and everything that I believe that I am....but that loving voice I hear...it has not once condemned..it hasn't said "I am disappointed..." or "it was a mistake when I called you"..but my heavenly Father comes running to me with open arms of love. And that's that. No shame. No condemnation. Only mercy and Grace. And I firmly believe that he has allowed me to struggle in the ways that I have so that I can know (an experiential knowledge) that His love for me does not change.
Dang. I love him so much. I love where I am at. I still hate the sin that lives in me...but I love that my God is bigger than it all.....and his love....oh his love...it cannot even be separated by death. My heart rests. mmmhhhh what a journey
What a God we have.
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3 comments:
Thats so fun! Thanks for the inspiring story!
Coleen, it is always wonderful to hear about your adventures in Austrailia, even better to hear of your journey with Him.
your struggles sound similar to my struggles this semester. and the truths that God's taught you about Himself and yourself spoke to me. Thank you so much for sharing.
love you and miss you.
im sitting here in Ike's on speedway crying over how much God has done in your life and in your heart. Who would have thought he would do so much in Australia? We all knew he was calling you there for such a good purpose...to draw you unto himself, to affirm who you really are in him, to give you rest...but I guess knowing that was his intent doesn't take away how awesome it is once he has done it. My soul is so grateful to our amazing God that he would be so gracious unto you...that he would pursue you SO INTENTLY...drawing you into his arms in Australia and speaking tenderly to you. :) wow....thanks for your blogs. You're a good writer my friend. I love hearing about your life and can't wait to be apart of it again :(
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